Jaded once again

[Guest]

one of the bad  things  about this  job is that you get to see the   good and also the bad   sides of  the ladyboy lifestyle, and all the assorted  baggage that goes   with having your life  basically revolve around these people [if it weren't  for ladyboys  i wouldn't have a gig, plain and simple].

    last fall when i  came back to LOS after a  5-month absence i  made a post on the old yellow  forum  about being  jaded and   cynical over here [maybe   the cynic and i have more in common than we think??], and how  it  was getting pretty old and tiresome.  it comes  from the  realization that, no matter  what, the  bottom line is that all your   friends  are prostitutes!  think about that.......if i lived in Boston   full-time i might know   1 or  2 hookers  EVER, and  may come across  another   15 or 20 in my typical travels  [of course i would never pay for one].   but here,    every person i know who is  not a  farang  ex-pat has their body up for sale. that is a  very strange feeling.

  i love ladyboys  very much.   some of these  girls   are great friends to me and   girls like   Nan and   May and Aon and  Natalie, etc, are  great people  who hang around with me because they like  my company, and  i don't give them any dough.  but the bottom line is that all the other ladyboys and ladies that i know here expect to be paid  when you sleep with them, and that is a very odd feeling.  it makes a person feel jaded and  a  bit leary and yes, cynical about the whole scene.   you know the old  saying about western hookers  getting 'out of the life'?  i  am in 'the life'   just  by association,  with the company i keep on a regular basis.

  I know.....i won't get any sympathy  from you guys   who only spend 3 or 4   weeks a year over here and are   basically  happy to be hip-deep in the   whole scene when you arrive, until the moment you leave.  i am also; i enjoy the scene and the life,   but it gets  old sometimes and you begin to wonder if you will ever meet anyone who is not a professional of some sort [in the   wrong profession!].

 I keep telling stogie bear....he is a lucky fucker because he has a  nice sweet GF named   Kui who is not a   working girl and actually hangs around with him because she, you know, likes him?  that is a rarity over here, believe me, and i am happy for him because he is a good guy and she is a good girl.  if  any of you guys can meet a girl like that, hold on to her.  on the other hand, if you have a  hooker for a girlfriend and    you think she is with you because of your   dazzling smile and  charming personality,   do a reality check. and yes, i must say it; if you are supporting your GF from far away the odds are pretty good that she is not sitting home watching TV every night waiting for your return, like a white knight coming back to relieve her of her boredom. just being honest here.

   jaded Jon

[wisetraveller]

Dear Jon

We members orf this site find ourselves in strange circumstances.

As has been stated by several members, we are a small bunch of guys who have discovered something special. The fact that the LBs don't fit into mainstream society means that they probably find it easy to drift into 'working' and it probably becomes addictive (the lifestyle that is).

Personal story - I met a Thai gg last year at a massage place in Bangkok. Paid for short time but she basically joined me for the whole weekend. ie when she finished work she came to see me. Took me to her home, I met her room mates, cousin, friends, etc. We had dinner, etc, etc. On my past night in BKK I left her place to catch a taxi, but she insisted on coming with me so that the taxi driver would not rip me off, (her words) and came in to my hotel for a final quickie (I was too tired to be even into it) but she came to my room because she wanted to. (no $$$).

We kept in contact for a few months and then it kind of died out. A few weeks ago she sent me an SMS to say 'I miss you and am thinking of you' I replied 'me too' or words to that effect. The next SMS from her was of the 'sick water buffalo, sick mother variety' I ignored it and have not and will not respond. (I did send a fairly generous bit of $$$ shortly after leaving BKK because I choose to, not because I felt I had to).

What is my point? Basically she did behave like a prostitute (recently), but also she displayed a lot of kindness and sincerity (when I was there). So being a good friend, and a sincere person, and being a working girl are not mutually exclusive.

I can understand how you feel jaded but it is probably worth bearing in mind that your friends (even though they are all 'workers') does not make them less valid people to know. Goodness and kindness can be found everywhere.

I am about as non-religious as you could possibly find, (can't believe I am writing this) but even Jesus Christ hung out with prostitutes - eg Mary Magdeline.

I hope this rambling helps.

best wishes

WiseTraveller

[Mai-Kee]

I know and understand every word you're saying Jon. Felt kind of the same way when I lived over there. When I was with my working gf, I was more or less all the time (over 8 months) only with her friends - who were all working girls.
You are very right, there is only one wayout: Find a non-working lb and hold on to her! It's really something different. There lifestyle, friends, etc. is totally different and they want to keep a wide gap to the barscene, which I fully understand. It's not easy for them not to get into that scene, because it's easy money if you're good looking and not all of the non-working girls are from well-to-do families. But they try hard and they are very suspicious if they see you hangin' around NEP all the time.
But if you're really seriously into lb's and not just into breaking the world record in shagging during your holidays then go for those. They're worth it!

MK

[Stewart]

>>>Personal story - I met a Thai gg last year at a massage place in Bangkok.  Paid for short time but she basically joined me for the whole weekend.  ie when she finished work she came to see me.  Took me to her home, I met her room mates, cousin, friends, etc.  We had dinner, etc, etc.  On my past night in BKK I left her place to catch a taxi, but she insisted on coming with me so that the taxi driver would not rip me off, (her words) and came in to my hotel for a final quickie (I was too tired to be even into it) but she came to my room because she wanted to.  (no $$$).  
We kept in contact for a few months and then it kind of died out.  A few weeks ago she sent me an SMS to say 'I miss you and am thinking of you'  I replied 'me too' or words to that effect.  The next SMS from her was of the 'sick water buffalo, sick mother variety'  I ignored it and have not and will not respond.  (I did send a fairly generous bit of $$$ shortly after leaving BKK because I choose to, not because I felt I had to).
What is my point?  Basically she did behave like a prostitute (recently), but also she displayed a lot of kindness and sincerity (when I was there).  So being a good friend, and a sincere person, and being a working girl are not mutually exclusive.>>>

Also remember that average incomes in Thailand are a fraction of what most people on this forum earn. It is only natural for the Thai girls to hope/ask that some of that perceived "incredible wealth" is shared on them, especially if people like us tell them how nice we think they are in the first place.

So, if we go into a bar, go to short time local hotel, and no numbers exchanged, these problems won't happen.

As soon as you say how nice she is, etc, etc.....and we all do I'll bet.....and exchange numbers, the expectation has been set. Take your pick!

[Guest]

Jon

A couple of weeks ago you mentioned a girl who had just got married to a german guy........well she also was online hooking for $$$ the next week.......Which is what I would expect.

In my view you have the best policy of not supporting a gf with big $......the more you give the more they will want......
Just hanging out in the same lifestyle level as you and getting that paid for is a pretty enjpyable treat for most.....

It never fails to amaze how many guys think they are the one who found true love with a hooker....(or any thai gal or LB)....and usually one of the older hands at that....in spite of the fact fact they are only visiting for a few weeks, cant speak thai, prob never been out of bkk, and never had a conversation with the gal about anything more significant that whether he can get a BJ right now.......makes we wonder how these guys invest their money if they ever get to keep any of it.....

JOn you spend a lot of time in thailand....but you never seem to "leave the office"...no wonder you get jaded........maybe try learning more Thai???....and deliberately taking more time away from people who know what your work is???

Cheers mate

[Guest]

Jon, debated about just emailing you on this, but what the hell some one else might find it useful too.

Part of the problem is that you only hang around with working girls. I used to do this too. When I moved there for a couple of years, I took the time to meet some non bar girls and now have a full time g/f who has never been in the bar scene and it is really nice.

You told me that you had most of your work "in the can" so kick back a little and start looking for where some non working LBs hang out.

Good luck and hope to see you in April.

First place to start is with some of the LBs you know well. Tell them what you are looking for, you might be surprised and they might line you up with some introductions ..

It is very hard for guys who go there once a year for a couple of weeks to get a non bar g/f (LB or GG), but if you are there more often it is very possible, but it is not easy. It takes time and frankly it is damn near like work.

Some of the universitys have LBs at them, perhaps some of your friends know some of these girls. Perhaps you go out to Ramkamhaeng and check it out.. see who is wandering around campus or at the food courts or libraries and be bold enough to introduce yourself.

I realize that face-pic seems like a waste of time, but I have noted that some of the LBs there note that they are not bargirls.. check them out.. just takes a few minutes to email them and you might get lucky.

When I found my g/f, I sent out about 50 emails, got about 25 responses, carried about ten of those to meetings in Thailand and ended up with only one that I was interested in.. did I mention it almost seems like work?? but I am happy and like many things "luck is part inspiration and part perspiration"

[stogie bear]

If you are jaded of this business and the oddballs in it, try working for UPS!

[Guest]

Dear Jon & members,

After spending the past 6 months and currently still in Asia I have on occasions felt jaded also. Then I have to get my mind back to realty again (being in Asia it€™s a bit hard) and think of the following points:

I have never met any of the members of this site, so I don€™t know if your brad pit or uncle fester! & I am making assumption based of people I have met and things I have read over the years and of course there are many exceptions.

Anyway Picture this you are In Europe or America and you are presented with 10 stunning 18-24 year olds not on the game and live normal western lives, how many of them do you think are going to go with you? How many are going to be happy that after a while you get bored of fucking them in every way you start to get a little more interested in one of her mates? Do you think they would agree to have photos of them on the Internet?

Lets get back to Thailand I was 20 when I met this amazing LB she was 23 we had a great time. I did not understand the score in Thailand at the time so I treated her like I would a western GF dinner, presents etc I carried this on for 2 years when I was on trips to Los. She became older and not so cute anymore, learnt the score on moved on.

If things were like the west in Thailand most people have jobs with ok pay and there was a small minority on the game giving a shit service for extortionate rates but still just as many beautiful 18-24 year old LB€™s what is the likelihood you are going to be able to fulfill your wildest fantasies like you do now? Or even be in the position to meet as many and be friends with the girls? I don€™t think the website would exist if this was the case.

Some times I feel jaded but then again I feel lucky that for the price of a packet of fags, beer & a kebab!! I can have one of the most amazing experiences known to man with a stunning girl of my dreams!