Am I jaded?

[robbo]

ok guys lookin for some help here and feedback. first ill fill you in. not a newbie to LOS,tho by no means a real old hand.
i arrived BKK this jan 6th after a 2 year abcence and a very heavy workload right up to 2 days prior to flight a planned 4 week stay,tho with a flexi airline ticket as allways can stay longer.sometimes do. ok taxi straight to BKK hotel,out for few beers tho not many. next day im begining to feel shite.......not right attall put it down to tiredness.over the next 10 days i get worse havea chest infection and temp,after 2 days im at the chemist getting over the counter antibiotics im hotel bound for 10 days cant drink,even too ill to shag, certainly no bars as feel headache.after 10 days i feel better gettin over it,so decide to head for pattaya to get some sea air knowing its so clean there ,slowly started to pick up from then.but something seems to have shaken me up a bit and this trip dosnt go all too well as others.when i started to feel better in BKK i considered going home early without so much as a legover! ididnt and i now wonder if i made the right choice. allthough i had some good times the remainder of trip was littered with hiccups barfines that went wrong and crap attitudes from girls. the rest of the trip i certainly didnt feel "in the game. i have allways had that " i just wanna get back to LOS" feeling..................you know that feeling the addict has!.............im wondering where im at now as im not sure how i feel about going back.was i jaded on that trip? have i been there n seen /done enough?im sitting here now actually wondring if i indeed will go back atall.anybody else been there on this one?or what say ye? should i go back?

[stogie bear]

Yikes... Hard luck on your trip, mate...

It sound's like your heart wasn't into rescuing the holiday when so much of it had already gone wrong. Do you think the exhaustion from your work load finally took its toll on your body?

You should definitely come back, though...

I'm not having a go at you (or maybe a little!) but when I hear people say "The girls had crap attitudes" or "The hotel was crap!" or "There are no decent restaurants here!" then it's usually a sign that the person sees his glass as half empty!

We all do that from time to time and we can't go 100 years and have great holidays every time.

Another thing... Maybe your hopes and expectations were a little too high... a stretch of time away from work and home... lots of great shagging... Then you get sick, lethargic, frustrated, pissed off and then resentful!

Just think... your next holiday (wherever it is) won't be nearly as bad as this one. That's gotta be a good thing, right?

Cheers...

SB

[langchai]

Yeah mate. Absolutely right.

You should get back on the horse. It can't be worse than this holiday. You'll feel right again in no time.
And in the event that you don't, you'll know for sure that LOS has no more pleasure to offer you (almost an impossibility).

[Looker]

(robbo @ Jul. 21 2008,08:16) ... should i go back?

It depends..
I've had very similar feelings to yours quite a number of times, and I've been sick too a couple of times as well while in BKK. So, I'm 100% sympathetic with what have happened to you.

The key here is another. You don't have to feel 'compelled' in being a monger like some of the other guys are. We are all different and what's good and works for others may not necessarily apply to you.

As for myself, nowadays I'm getting my kicks much more in reading the trip reports and what the guys out there are doing, looking at the ATS pics/video and talking about the whole scene than actually partecipating in it.

I've been going to LOS for quite a while and my level of interest has dropped significantly. Not that I stay totally away from Nana when I go to BKK and for sure what I've done is a mere fraction of what some guys have done, but honestly..I could do without it.

Also, my level of interest toward holidays in general has changed and I enjoy 'some' kind of holidays in 'some' places only. I think it's pointless wanting to do what others are doing because it won't work for me. Simple

[robbo]

yes STOGIE,i think it may well have been a factor of a half empty glass of mine which jaded my appetite and outlook, your spot on,i know as we all do that LOS is great...........if your attitude is right. so im reflecting on this one. and yes i do think id overdone it work etc prior to trip,it all added up. bad timing. hmm thanks for your replies,good points for me to ponder and get perspective. itsa bit strange kinda way im feeling about it at mo as i love LOS yet feel a bit off the urge at mo.it may change. im guessing it will

[stogie bear]

You don't have to feel 'compelled' in being a monger like some of the other guys are.

Great post looker and the bit I singled out was something I learned the hard way...

When I first arrived on the scene I always felt obligated to go to the bars (which I always hated) because that's just what we all did.

I'm more than happy these days to meet up for a drink at Guess Bar for an hour and then toddle off home on my own...

I always get the tremors when people want a 'wing man' or someone to "do the rounds" with or even the word 'brewski' sends me running to the safety of another episode of Perry Mason!

Good to see that robbo is getting it all worked out and put behind him!

Here's to the next trip...

[SukhumvitRoad]

(stogie bear @ Jul. 22 2008,06:27) ...I always get the tremors when people want a 'wing man' or someone to "do the rounds" with or even the word 'brewski' sends me running to the safety of another episode of Perry Mason!

A big thumbs up there, my friend.

[Looker]

(stogie bear @ Jul. 22 2008,06:27)  Great post looker and the bit I singled out was something I learned the hard way...

Thank you

Well - it took me years to break away from the herding around teenager style. I was often conditioned by others in doing things I didn't really love to.

Today I feel comfortable to say "Guys, you please go if you want to, but count me out "

[geosight]

HI

Know exactly what you went through. A few years ago was working in Hong Kong and was planning a trip to BBk as was the norm for me.
When i arrived in BBK I couldn€™t shake this feeling of nausea and ill will to the locals . Everything I did just went horrible wrong.

In the end I just decided to leave early and was in a really confused state as to why and what was going on with my head. After some soul searching, I put it down to a heavy work load and a lapsing memory of the shit that is the western world ...
Been back many times since then and work in BBk now, so my advice is to put down to experience and move on

[Guest]

excellent replies from all fellow members.Have been coming to LOS since 1994 and now spend a lot of time in Thailand.Had always wanted to screw myself to death in the first few years but just like in most places once you get to know Bangkok,Hua Hin and the many other places I have been to in Thailand, as well as searching out great eating spots, the crazed sex fiend is tamed somewhat.
As for bummer holidays, well I guess we have all had one or more of those.
Just came back from Vietnam.Crazy traffic, unfriendly locals,underdeveloped infrastructure.After a few days of a 13 day visit I wished I was back in Thailand.Once back here the traffic seemed to be normal and orderly, whereas before I had always considered it as chaos.
Illness it can wreck any holiday.I was booked for the Crazy Horse salon in Paris and got food poisoning.It wrecked 3-4 days of sight seeing.Just one example.
There is a lot to enjoy throughout Thailand and the lb fun can be just a part of it rather than a focus, if desired.

[jimslim]

Some interesting points here , for me one of the best things about being on holiday anywhere in the world is getting away from the nine to five routine , having no set of rules, and coming and going as you please , eating , drinking sleeping when you want .

You should never feel you have to do something because you feel its the done thing .

My first 4-5 visits to Thailand were with a group of guys I've known all my life , good friends , but sometimes I got bored with people trying to introduce routines when there was no need for them , we have to go for an evening meal at 8pm , we have to go get drunk afterwards , same routine every day .
I would just wander off and do my own thing sometimes .

I had a friend who returned from 3 months in Thailand , when I asked him what he did the answer was nothing , he got drunk every night and slept all day , fair enough he seemed happy at that but to me that would be a waste of a holiday .

Just remember its your holiday , it costs a lot of money , so relax and enjoy it and do whatever you please , when you please .

Oh and my glass is always full or half full  

[Otho]

Robbo, sorry to hear you had a bad time. For what it's worth, my bet is that it's because of the heavy and stressful workload you had to endure, right up until you left.

It's predictable and understandable for your body and your energy to collapse after months or years of 'holding it together', come what may. I have a good friend who worked as a doctor in the British Virgin Islands (nice job!) She was always treating well paid business people who'd come for a holiday and found themselves feeling really sick as soon as they arrived. She said it was all too common. In fact she used to say that if you get a splitting headache on the first day of your holiday, it's actually a positive sign that you're in the first stages of winding down!

That's all very well but, as everyone on this thread has observed, you're also under pressure - even if it's self inflicted pressure - to not waste a precious moment of your trip, otherwise known as getting wasted and shagging yourself senseless.

Again as most people have suggested, it's worth resisting that pressure and just chilling out for a few days. Sleep late, eat well, get a non-sexy massage, take a short walk, read a book, go back to bed and sleep all afternoon. Without feeling guilty about it!  

Even if you're on a limited time it's worth doing, as the remaining days will be so much more enjoyable once you're at least a bit refreshed.

If you've enjoyed Thailansd before, there's no reason why you would never enjoy it again. But next time, maybe you could try taking your time - like, don't have a beer until and unless you really, really fancy one. Don't have a shag until and unless you see someone and you think oh my god, I have to have her NOW!

You never know, it might work, and it might make the girls look beautiful again, the food to taste good again, the hotel staff to smile at you again and all that good stuff.

Good luck. Hope it works out.

[robbo]

many thanks to all for their words,they are valued. interesting and relevent.one thing i do know now is that i should have cut short my trip once i was well enough to fly and gone home it would have been a positive thing to do and should have promised myself a quick return to make up for it.i suppose as i had a min of 4 weeks i figured id be fine but it wasnt the case in some part. you live and learn.i like to go to bars and gogo but im nota heavy drinker and not the abslolute monger that mayby some are, thats not a critisism of anyone.as i have been a real shag fest seeker in past .(can still manage it )im taking some responsibility for a part crap hol and decided not to rush off back to LOS ,i usually go in uk winter anyway,but this time im not planning anything,if and when i go im gonna do a very spur of the moment trip but also ensure im de- stressed before .but you know guys..............i still cant get thai girls and LB outa my head , for me ,its gota be long black hair big brown eyes and "i lub you soooo much lobert"(for a ST) just love em. so i expect ill be back

[LBloom]

Hi all,

Really good thread - I have only been to LOS six times but on two of them I arrived in a really stressed-out state  and got sick, etc. - I know enough at this stage that when I start looking at the Thais (not just the LBs) as being 'on-the-make',etc that it is coming from me and not from them (is this not a comment on how stressful a lot of our lives are? - where I come from anyone interested in doing their job well is stressed out!).  

My solution has been to schedule a few days at the beginning on one of the islands (Ko Pan Yang or Ko Chang in my case) and swing in a hammock for a few days, getting regular massages and only going 'mongering' when my energy gets up - then head for Pattaya or BKK.

Now to the point of this posting. When I get to to Pattaya or BKK, the first thing I do is check up on old 'friends' - these may be LBs, mamasams, ladies, etc that I have met on previous visits but not necessarily ones I want to fuck - just people I want to meet up with again and see how they are getting on.   I call these people 'friends' as we are only 'ships that pass in the night' and I know that only by living in the LOS would the massive cultural divides be bridged.  But, to me, they are important and we have gone drinking in their haunts; talking to the small hours about our loves, families and dreams.

My question is - and this is directed mainly at the 'old-hands' - how come in the various postings about trip reports, etc., it is so seldomly mentioned about meeting up with a Thai you have liked? who has invited you to meet his/her family?  Am I the only one who has been pressed into partaking in (the truely awful) karaoke and then being press-ganged into visiting the temple the next morning while still suffering from a hangover?  Surely board members have experienced the amazing Thai hospitality and ended up being 'god-father' to one of your terak's younger siblings before you knew it?

Tell me that I am not the only one

[robbo]

hi LBLOOM you are the only one! mayby you are the chosen one!...........no but i say good on you your taking in a bit of thai life and culture,it cant harm can it? if you have the time and some dont, the cycle of eat sleep drink shag can be bit same same(did i say that) a good post,and if i go back i shall head straight to HUA HIN for some chill out 1st .very interesting that youve been ill /stressed twice on arrival.i got ill allmost as soon as i hit the ground so no chance to de stress.so a pre trip holiday here in the wonderful uk is on my menu now.