But, do they really like us?

[stogie bear]

A long term relationship is very possible. Not with a prostitute of course but there are thousands of nice ladyboys out there looking for love.

Dunno why you would bothert though, unless you lay down some very strict ground rules.

1 - Don't ever be sad near me. I don't care enough about you to wonder why.

2 - Don't move in with me. Two nights a week is enough.

3 - I give - You take. I decide what and when.

4 - You can lie to me all you want. I won't be listening anyway.

5 - Don't ask me to choose between my laptop and you. You'll be disappointed.

[Bit Beefy]

(stogie bear @ Jun. 11 2006,00:00) A long term relationship is very possible. Not with a prostitute of course but there are thousands of nice ladyboys out there looking for love.

Dunno why you would bothert though, unless you lay down some very strict ground rules.

1 - Don't ever be sad near me. I don't care enough about you to wonder why.

2 - Don't move in with me. Two nights a week is enough.

3 - I give - You take. I decide what and when.

4 - You can lie to me all you want. I won't be listening anyway.

5 - Don't ask me to choose between my laptop and you. You'll be disappointed.

Stogie u kill me, what do u mean u dont care lol not even a little bit

[Guest]

I have been travelling on and off for 30 years.....including many trips to LOS, and reckon that human nature and motivation is pretty much the same every where.....but different cultures can put a different facade on identical underlying behaviour.

So I usually apply 2 tests to any set of circumstances that I may not be sure of

1. If this behaviour was happening in my home country would I be suspicious, would it smell of a scam, would there appear to be ulterior motives, would I believe it back home in the cultural setting I know and can navigate confidently in???

2. and Especially when thinking about someone who is spending time with you and in your bed....I ask myself...If, (either in LOS or at home), I was that other person ,would I really be wanting to spend time with, or really care for, someone like I actually am now???  eg If I was a cute 20 year old would I genuinely want to spend time with the guy I actually am......and why?

The answer to these questions usually gives me a real good steer as to what the situation actually is....

And I have to agree with the comments above that...

If you cant hold a wide ranging conversation with your friend.....either in English or Thai...stick to STs as you will both be bored

SPeaking thai.....even not too fluently....is pretty much essential if you want to fit into her real world

If your older.....get and older GF....ie over 25... preferably who has not been involved in the sex industry if you want a steady LB gf.....They usually really appreciate you...knowing that you have many other options

Also...get slim and smell good  

[Bit Beefy]

i smell good but struggle with the slimness As for the questions that you ask yourself.. great ideas i ask myself a few also, one i always ask is i wonder if there happy to be here? r they enjoying themselves?

[PigDogg]

It seems we all pretty much agree that they are with us for financial security (or money number 1 putting a pejorative spin to it).

With western women, that's sometimes the case, but perhaps more likely they want a boyfriend and they want babies.  They'll often settle for guys they "like" instead of guys that completely rock their world so they can be married.   But generally farang women would prefer not to marry down in social class.

So if a ladyboy wants financial security she might choose a jai dee farang that she genuinely likes but maybe doesn't rock her world. I'm not sure if that's a bad thing.

[Guest]

(Bit Beefy @ Jun. 10 2006,19:46) i ask myself a few also, one i always ask is i wonder if there happy to be here? r they enjoying themselves?

...and then I worry if I possibly pay them too little, cause their buffalo may need surgery, her mom needs new teeth or her boyfriend a new car.

Do some of you really question what they think of us while serving us? Of course they do it for the love they have quickly developed in between a fiew beers in the bar or wherever else we have picked them up.
A butterflying farang, who spends his time getting filled up with and whatever else , has always been every ladyboys dream.

The illusion of being loved for your great looks or at least personality may be nice, but without the right amount in your wallet, that love will fade as quickly as the beer in my glass.

As an unexperienced newbie (many years back), I was falling for that illusion and actually fell in love there. I had a great time until it was time to wake up and face reality.
Ever since, I take a more realistic look at it, enjoy my time, but don't really give a shit about what they may think of me.

I'm not out there to find the love of my life, but the fuck of the night!

[jmaryt]

mardhi!

no reflection on you personally,but what would you expect?..as stogie once so eloquently stated "they are boys with long hair!"..of course they are not gonna have feelings for ya!..just "show "em the money!"

[Guest]

(jmaryt @ Jun. 11 2006,00:35) mardhi!

 no reflection on you personally,but what would you expect?..as stogie once so eloquently stated "they are boys with long hair!"..of course they are not gonna have feelings for ya!..just "show "em the money!"  

I am suprised to see you on this forum to be honest. I actually do not think you like ladyboys at all. You call them He/She and Boys with long hair. All you do is bitch about them. Shit mate give up and take up another hobby.      

[Guest]

I think y'all don't understand some very fundamentals of Thai culture.

In Thai culture, it is more common to be attached or marry someone for convenience (someone "take care of me") and have the love come later. Frankly, having been married twice, and failed, I think this convenience or comfortable part first, and love second, may be the way to go.

What I'm saying is that very few Thais (ladyboy, lady, worker, non-worker) love first. Most books on Thail culture bring this out.

So, a Thai ladyboy will "love" you in her sense first, meaning, she will be attached to you if you can take care of her, and if it lasts, she will "love" you in the emotional sense, later.

This is a bit hard for us to accept or even understand, but after having read so many culture books on it, and watching this the last few years, I beginning to understand it, and it ain't really so bad.

[coxy277]

im married to a thai g/g and im aload to play with l/b but a thia has true blue blood and only mixes with use as a need ,if they had a way of living without us they would

[Bit Beefy]

(LBHunter @ Jun. 11 2006,02:31)

(Bit Beefy @ Jun. 10 2006,19:46) i ask myself a few also, one i always ask is i wonder if there happy to be here? r they enjoying themselves?

...and then I worry if I possibly pay them too little, cause their buffalo may need surgery, her mom needs new teeth or her boyfriend a new car.

Do some of you really question what they think of us while serving us? Of course they do it for the love they have quickly developed in between a fiew beers in the bar or wherever else we have picked them up.    
A butterflying farang, who spends his time getting filled up with   and whatever else  , has always been every ladyboys dream.

The illusion of being loved for your great looks or at least personality may be nice, but without the right amount in your wallet, that love will fade as quickly as the beer in my glass.

As an unexperienced newbie (many years back), I was falling for that illusion and actually fell in love there. I had a great time until it was time to wake up and face reality.
Ever since, I take a more realistic look at it, enjoy my time, but don't really give a shit about what they may think of me.

I'm not out there to find the love of my life, but the fuck of the night!  

each to there own mate but i for one dont want to be with a hooker who would rather be some where else, yeah we pay for play, but im in the habbit of treating them like people. i want her to get hard and cum, i want her to smile and if this means that i have to put some work in so be it... why would you barfine a girl take her to your room if she doesnt wana kiss, has a limp dick, she looks pisssssed off and lies there like shes dead while u roger her the more they enjoy ure company the more u will enjoy theres... As we have all said we all want the GFE from time to time, howd u expect to get it if u wont give her the BFE

[Guest]

(ziggystardust @ Jun. 10 2006,22:16) So, a Thai ladyboy will "love" you in her sense first, meaning, she will be attached to you if you can take care of her, and if it lasts, she will "love" you in the emotional sense, later.

sounds like something that a  LOT of time would have to go into, way more time than most of us part-timers have available to us on our trips to Thailand.  Again, it goes back to "the only people who can have a true relationship with ladyboys are the ones who live there". You, Stogie, Snick and a few others have this luxury that 90% of the punters here do not.

  Even if I did live there I am not prepared to do this........ she will be 'attached to me if I take care of her first and if it lasts she will love me later'.....   Fuck that; this could take months or years and cost a pile of cash getting someone attached to you  before you realize  "she does not love me and now it's 'later'".   Not prepared to take that chance..... short times still better IMO, and despite how much we may  learn about Thai culture I still believe a 21-year old anywhere wants to be with someone closer to her own age than to her father's.

[Guest]

(Bit Beefy @ Jun. 10 2006,19:46)  As for the questions that you ask yourself.. great ideas i ask myself a few also, one i always ask is i wonder if there happy to be here? r they enjoying themselves?

I wonder about this also, Beefy..... and if I feel for one nano-second that the person I am with does not genuinely want to be with me than off she goes back to her crappy go-go bar and another new girl can take her place who DOES want to be there.

I am not wasting my time with clock-watchers or people who would prefer to be at a disco with their friends than with me, let 'em go there and have fun and just find another, there are hundreds.

[Guest]

Great thread, JD, I think you hit the motherlode! Good thing I'm tracking it.
Is it Academic enough to be move, as someone had suggested? And if so, will I be off the tracking system?

Ronin

[Guest]

you can track this topic for as long as you want, we won't move it anywhere until it is off this main page but people seem to be adding in their points a lot so it will probably be here for a while.

Again, I am surprised we haven't heard from any true romantics out there who say "Oh, but I am the exception to this rule; {X} from Patpong really DOES love me and care for me, she tells me all the time". There are probably guys reading and thinking that but too shy to speak up and I don't blame you....look in the mirror and make sure YOU really believe it before you try and convince us.